How Trauma Affected My Grief Process

Today, I come to you from beautiful San Diego, California to talk about how trauma affected my grief process.

How trauma affected my grief process

My next YouTube video is now LIVE! Simply click on the video above and you will be taken right to it! I have started a segment where I will not only be sharing my story more in depth, but I will do so while hiking in different places around the world.

Today, I come to you from beautiful San Diego, California to talk about how trauma affected my grief process. I wrote a blog about dealing with PTSD after trauma and I couldn’t believe how many people didn’t realize that trauma was also triggering their grief process to be so much worse.

Trauma for me has been just as painful as grief. That is what I am sharing and talking to listeners today in my YouTube video.

Please be sure to share a comment on the video and let me know what you think.

Keep living life.

-Laura

How to Set A Goal

You may have been told that setting a goal is very important. Guess what, I’m here to tell you that it is. There are so many reasons for this.

You may have been told that setting a goal is very important. Guess what, I’m here to tell you that it is. There are so many reasons for this. In fact, I think setting goals has saved my life. I’m here to share with you a bit about my experience with setting goals, what my goals are moving forward in my life, and how you can set your own goals too (and really reach them this time). Keep reading for all the details.

Why goals are important…

When you don’t have a goal in your life you don’t have something to reach for. You don’t have something you are looking forward to achieving. A goal can be several different things. If you have been following me the past year or two, you know my goals have revolved around reaching a specific summit around the world. Each one I have attempted has been more difficult than the last. It has caused me to continue to work hard for the next mountain in mind.

Now, I’m not telling you your goals should be to climb a mountain. In fact, they don’t need to be anything athletic. Perhaps you want to excel at work, maybe you want to make a certain amount of money, maybe you want to save more money. There are so many things that you may want to achieve this month, this year, and in your life.

But…if the future is not promised, why not push us to reach our goals. Why not ensure you’re not at the end of your life and wishing you did more, saw more, and become more?

How to set your goals..

The next step is to set your goal. Like I said before, what came to mind when you thought of a personal goal? If you can’t think of anything, try thinking of something that is slightly out of your reach right now but you know eventually it could become attainable if you work hard.

There are also so many different level of goals you can achieve. I like to focus on ones that are 6 months or 1 year away. When it’s much longer I end up feeling overwhelmed that that will take me a long time to reach that.

The goals in my life…

I’ve had so many different phases in my life. One thing that has always been consistent is setting goals for myself. Whether that is athletically, travel wise, in my career, and everything in between, goals are critical for you to grow into the person you want to be.

Some fun facts about me and the goals I have accomplished (I feel like this suddenly is a boasting moment and it’s not meant to be.)

I went to World youth and World juniors in high school. Both were in Europe and I competed for team Canada.

I ended up going to the University of Texas at El Paso on a full scholarship for track and field.

I quite any type of 9-5 job and started an online marketing business full time that I have currently done for 4 years.

I’ve had a lot of times in my life where I have missed my goal. I’m proud to say it has never been a situation that has crushed me. I’m simply focused on a new goal or gone after it again.

My current goals…

I talk on my Instagram account about my various mountaineering goals. Right now, I have a permit in for Mount Whitney (highest peak in continental USA) and I am booked to climb Aconcagua at the end of the year (highest peak in South America). Both of this I believe are definitely attainable but I also know I’m going to have to keep working hard in order to get in better shape and even become mentally tougher. With some of these longer and higher hikes I’ve started leaning more mountaineering skills that will help me continue in the future (hint – I want to end up climbing Denali).

I also now officially have the goal of starting a YouTube channel. My goal is to share my story while hiking through the mountains around the world. I would love for you to subscribe (it would help me out so much while starting!) click HERE now.

So, what came to your mind when you were reading this? Did a large goal pop up suddenly? Perhaps something you have always wanted to achieve but didn’t know where to start.

Start now. Write it down and put it on your fridge. You may achieve it even quicker than you thought.

Thanks for reading. As always, keep living life.

-Laura Leanne

 

 

Dealing With PTSD After Trauma

When I think of PTSD I don’t think of grief. At least I didn’t used to. I’m sure most people would agree with me, unless you are one of the unfortunate few that are currently nodding your head. For those of you that have experienced PTSD from a traumatic incident involving grief, I want to … Continue reading “Dealing With PTSD After Trauma”

When I think of PTSD I don’t think of grief. At least I didn’t used to. I’m sure most people would agree with me, unless you are one of the unfortunate few that are currently nodding your head. For those of you that have experienced PTSD from a traumatic incident involving grief, I want to first tell you that this is actually very normal. I hate how I always feel like I must be crazy with some of my emotions. Then I suddenly post it on my Instagram and the comments and messages come flooding in telling me that’s exactly what they are experiencing but either did not know how to put it into words OR they thought they must be crazy so wouldn’t dare say it out loud.

Well guess what, if you experienced seeing a loved one die in front of you, you experienced taking care of them and it was hard on you, you experienced seeing your loved one suffer, you experienced getting a terrible phone call, and a million other ways you see someone you care for deeply pass away, you probably have experienced a very traumatic event which now probably causes you a bit or a lot of PTSD.

So, to go into detail on my specific experience and what I experience. Insert deep breathes…

James was chatting about history one moment and the next moment he was on the ground. There are little moments about that night that I do not remember and really don’t feel like remembering. So, thanks brain for not bringing that back up with me. I remember thinking he must have fainted and started to shake him. I remember medics coming in and suddenly finding it hard to breathe and thinking this is the worlds shittiest dream. And to skip ahead a few hours, I remember the doctor telling me my husband wouldn’t make it as I was kneeling beside James holding his hand.

Little things about my night just come to me. I’ll be walking and SMACK (that wasn’t a door hitting me, although I think it would actually feel better) I remember seeing the monitor and noticing for the first time he had no heartbeat. Things that I hate that make me think of random things about that night…

  • Ambulances
  • Seeing any emergency hospital sign
  • Anyone telling me they had the worst day ever and it is not hard AT ALL.
  • Any kind of surprise good or bad. I’m surprised out, thanks.

A lot more, however those ones seem to be reoccurring and those damn ambulances never seem to go away.

I’m really not writing this blog to give you any kind of advice. Just deep breathes. Although I’m never a fan of time heals all, I really do think these kinds of things decline as time goes on and you simply learn how to deal with them. For example, with an ambulance I just sit there and literally hold my breathe and then you suddenly stop hearing the sirens and then I count to three quickly in my mind slowly and then I’m okay again. Those 25 seconds seem to go on forward, but if you asked me about ambulances 1 year ago I would say I f*cking hate them and they always put me in the worst mood. PROGRESS!

So no, you are not crazy. You have experienced something your brain had a hard time comprehending and it still struggles from time to time.

Have you experienced this? Has it gotten easier over time? Feel free to comment below or send me a message on Instagram (click here).